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Sand is at the top of my list for a reason. If I could outlaw only ONE font, it would be Sand. It is the serial-killer font with the least personality. There is nothing charming or interesting about it — it’s just creepy — and not in a good scary-movie way. The worst thing about this font isn’t even the way it looks; it’s the way it’s misused. I see this font on posters and brochures for family vacations — as if because the name of the font is “Sand,” that means that it was meant to be used on top of images of sandy beaches. Or, worse yet, it’s often used in relation to children. I’m assuming because someone out there thinks this is how a child would write? Stop! You’re giving kids nightmares, and you’re making me pull my hair out in frustration. For all of you new designers with only 30 fonts installed on your computer, I know it is tempting to choose these “fun” or “different” fonts instead of the good old standbys — but it’s better practice for you to design around a simple, strong font than for you to rely on a disaster like Sand to add interest to your design. Please stay far away from this font. Can we start a petition? Anyone?

Papyrus is old and crackly, and I suppose it’s meant for designs with an Egyptian theme? I guess that would be okay to use Papyrus in that instance — and only that instance. But not for body copy. It would be too hard to read in large doses. And, I don’t think it would work as a headline font either. It’s not strong enough – or bold enough to grab anyone’s attention. And, I definitely wouldn’t use it for the headline on something large like a movie poster or the front of a book or brochure. It’s too unprofessional, too easy to ignore, and too dull. Plus, it’s too thin (and crackly) to show up on a decent background. You know what? On second thought, pyramids or no pyramids, put this font to rest. You can do better.

Can you say cheesy? I know that Brush Script is supposed to be nostalgic. It’s supposed to take you back to milkshakes and drive-ins. What else is it good for? Nothing! You can’t use it as a replacement for actual handwriting. It looks nothing like real handwriting. If that’s what you are going for, there are many better fonts out there. And, you can’t use it for anything high-end like invitations or announcements. Like I said, it’s cheesy. Obviously, you can’t use a script font for body copy or regular headlines. Brush Script is best used when you are purposely pushing “retro” in people’s faces — like an Old Navy commercial. That’s it. Otherwise, leave it alone.

Ugh. Apple Chancery is the worst of the pretending-to-be-fancy fonts. If you don’t own another script font, and you’re working on any type of design that calls for a snooty font, you’re better off using a sleek sans-serif in a minimalist setting than choosing Apple Chancery. I can’t stand how the letters seem to work against one another. When I see Apple Chancery, all I think of is homemade invitations printed from a word processor on white double-folded copy paper. Please help me stop the madness. And please, leave Apple Chancery for your Aunt Celia to use in the church bulletin. (Actually, if you can talk Aunt Celia out of it, please do. This font isn’t even good enough for her).

I dislike Comic Sans for many reasons. But mostly, I hate the way it is used. People don’t just abuse Comic Sans by using it on every child-related or somewhat entertaining poster or brochure headline. I see Comic Sans used all of the time for body copy. What?!? Yes! Body copy. Is it hard to read? Yes! Does it loose it’s luster in a crowded space? Yes! Is there EVER a reason to use ANY decorative font for body copy? NO!! Keep Comic Sans where it belongs — in the comics.

Even though it’s not a specific font, I had to throw this in. As I designer, your main job is to communicate to your audience, market, customers, etc. You can’t do that if they can’t read your message. Script fonts were not designed to be used in all caps. Ever.

There are MANY other fonts still in use that have been misused and over-abused, but I’ve narrowed it down to this, my top five. I do want to say, since I normally don’t write such negative posts, that I do not blame the fonts or the font creators for the disastrous designs that have come from the birth of these fonts. It is we, the designers, and those who think they are designers, who have dragged these fonts through the dirt for too long. Please let them rest.
 

Have other fonts that you think should be against the law? Tell me about them!! Let’s add them to the list!

Think I’m wrong about any of these fonts? I have a challenge for you: send me a link to any website or piece of artwork that you think uses one of these five fonts in an appealing way — where a person would say, YES, that is the PERFECT font for that design. If I agree, I will happily post a screenshot and will admit I am wrong. Or, if I don’t agree, I may post the screenshot anyway for others to comment on. Don’t send me anything that’s been copyrighted though — we’re not about plagiarism here at Creative Opera.